Gender Observations

Quite a few things strike me with regard to gender roles here. Some observations:

• Majority of my interactions have unintentionally been with men. Most women take a passive stance in the social scene. So far, walking on the streets and figuring out public transport, I must have talked to 50 men and 2 women. I would love to get to know some more women, but most that I have been introduced to shyly say “hello” and then retreat.
• I have a weird personal inclination to really watch how people walk, and try conjecture their character/mood/state of mind/intentions. Men here usually walk with a comfortable, confident jaunt, gesticulating expressively. Women tend to inhabit a smaller space, look down, are quieter, and appear to be trying to blend in.
• Above observation was made a few weeks ago. Today I think I figured out why. The other day I debated buying a hijab just to cover myself so men would not pay me so much unwanted attention. I’m still seriously considering it! When I walk alone, too many men I don’t know call out to me (either greeting or inquiring or complementing), or even walk with me, asking where I’m going… None of their business! Ignoring them doesn’t help either.
• Compared to “in the west,” men are more comfortable demonstrating affection for each other—holding hands, etc. Bars are more dominated by men, and boy can Ethiopian men move. They move everything. The dancing is not as sexualised as “in the west” (though of course some is). 2 men will get up and wind their bodies around each other, shaking it to no end, all in the name of having a good time. I really like this—not everything needs to be sexualised.
• In the rural areas, gender roles in everyday life are very different for men and women. Men work all day in the farms while women are in charge of cooking, taking care of children, and fetching firewood and water (sometimes they also grow crops at home). You know the story.